Just dry up. Fizzle out. Come to a place where you lack all novelty and relevance?
I am afraid.
The thought has occurred to me more than once. It was especially prominent in my mind before going public with this blog.
It’s even more nerve racking to offer myself to you seriously, knowing how easy it is to stop. Take my brother’s encouragement recently for example:
Creativity, in a sense, is based in faith. There is no guarantee of fresh insights tomorrow. Why not store up all today’s articles for distribution in the years to come?
I think the underlying fear though, deeper than simply the lack of content, is what the inability to create would (seem to) mean.
“Aren’t you afraid you run out of content?”
The question is really asking,
“Aren’t you afraid you fail at this?”
“Aren’t you afraid that you won’t be able to sustain this?”
“Aren’t you afraid that you’ll prove that you are not as creative as you think?”
Yes. Yes. Yes.
I am afraid that this will be a colossal waste of my time, and more proof of my own inadequacies. Can you relate?
What then are our options?
Abandon all effort in the fear that I will be like every blogger strewn out along the highway?
Will you stop painting (Gabby), because it is possible that one day in the future you may not have an idea worth painting?
Will you stop singing because you fear one day there will be no words?
How do you answer these questions? How do you deal with these fears?